This will definitely be a somber post.
Today, Melanie told me how her classmate saw a girl jump in front of an oncoming train on the underground. Needless to say, the girl died and the classmate who witnessed it will likely be scarred for months, if not longer. This is something I’ve been terrified of potentially witnessing, since the platforms are so open. I’ve been scared I’ll fall, accidentally push someone, or see someone jump on purpose. In Tokyo, trains have automated barriers on the platforms that prevent people getting on/off until the train is stopped in the correct place. I’ve only seen that here at Westminster station. Now, whether these are suicide, accident, or whatever prevention, I don’t know. I wish it was implemented more places in London.
I’m no stranger to depression. My family is well aware of all (or at least most) the struggles I’ve had trying to get to a place where I’m happy with myself and life in general. When I was recently off my medication I realised how off-kilter and out of control of my life I felt. It was terrible. I won’t lie and say I’ve never contemplated suicide. I think everyone who has struggled with depression has at some point. But I’ve never been in such a terrible place in my life where I forgot completely about everyone I’d be leaving to deal with the aftermath. This girl that jumped, I don’t know what was happening in her life. I can’t presume to know, and it is unfair of me to judge her in any way; I’m honestly not trying to do that at all. But I keep thinking about who all she has left behind and how they will move on from this. What about all of those unsuspecting people who just happened to be standing on the platform, like Melanie’s classmate? They aren’t directly related to this girl, but are still going to need help moving on. This one, self-inflicted action has the potential to affect dozens of people. It’s really sad. I’m sad and I wasn’t even there to witness it. I hope whoever she left behind finds a way to cope together.